today i got into a conversation with a coworker that had me intrigued to say the least.  the gist of the conversation was regarding our true natures.

now normally I’d describe myself as fairly non-confrontational (unless really provoked), sappy at times, happy, and i dunno…just how a normal person would see themselves i suppose.  i try to be a good person, volunteer my time and work, take pleasure in comforting others and being a loyal friend.  my beliefs are against torture, violence or abuse of any kind and i take solace in tending to my animals lovingly.  i have often been enraged hearing about animal abuse or innocent people being victims of some senseless tragedy.

at any rate, I’d like to think or rather i rationally think that if left in the wild with nothing to eat, i couldn’t bring myself to kill an innocent animal for food…but rather live off the earth and have vegetation provide me the sustenance i need.  the interesting thing is…that I’m not a violent person usually but there are some things that override my rational mind and overwhelm my emotions.  take for example the video on youtube showing a marine throwing an innocent crying puppy off a cliff.  if you haven’t seen this aberration of a video click here.  i warn you…it’s NOT for animal lovers or people with delicate sensibilities.  it’s graphic, might be real and extremely upsetting.

ok so after i had seen this video (i sincerely hope that video is FAKE), i was so upset and enraged.  my emotions were swirling with rage and hoping that a bullet had somehow found its way to his head.  i knew that if i had ever encountered that kind of bullshit, instead of doing what law-abiding mild-mannered citizens would do and calling the cops or the ASPCA, i would rip that guys eyes out and give him a taste of what pain that animal probably went through.

the funny thing is…should i feel some sense of guilt about saying or feeling that way?  if that is truly how i feel when every emotion in my body completely overrides my mind, isn’t it possible that instinct could too?  let’s say i was stranded somewhere with no food.  would my instinct take over so much to the point where i could hunt for my food and not feel remorse or guilt?  after all, survival of the strongest is the only rule in nature…but as humans i thought we were somehow elevated above that.  apparently not.

this conversation, needless to say, made me think about human nature and perhaps how we have been egotistic as a species in thinking that we are so much better than animals.  you see two dogs fighting over a toy and think to yourself ‘i’m so much better than that.  i wouldn’t do that because I’m human and because i could rationally reason the situation out.’  but is that always true?  I’m not so sure anymore.